Dos & Donts of festive ’23

By Kabelo Mollo

December, the 12^th month of the year is finally upon us, and because we’re living in a new dispensation it arrived in tandem with Dezemba. It doesn’t always happen, but when it does, sit up and take note! It’s a big month. There will be lots going on and as usual I come to you readers with a guide to this season.

Dos & Donts of festive ’23:

1. Don’t abuse women, children and any other vulnerable member of society. I don’t think I need to give reasons. You just shouldn’t do it! Be a person everybody feels safe around. It’s just better this way.
2. Do make sure you’ve budgeted appropriately for the festive period and the January that comes after it! School fees, uniforms etc. Personally, I’m at that age where I must think of the January budget before I think about “dizzy tyd”.
3. Don’t be a pest, whether it’s on the roads, or Restaurants or even family get togethers. Don’t be “that guy” Everyone is trying to avoid because you’ve over indulged and have turned yourself in to a spectacle. There’s no good reason to be a spectacle, sibadala.
4. Do drink in moderation. The nectar of the Gods is definitely for our enjoyment. There are men and women in different parts of the world who have painstakingly fermented our tipple of choice. Imbibe it with the fitting respect.
5. Don’t mix drinks. Again, sibadala, for you to be on the whisky, then champagne, then tequila then This, that and the next thing! Then you’re on the socials shouting blue murder about your hangover, come on man, this isn’t amateur hour at the Apollo!
6. This one is tough, but definitely do keep working out through the festive season. There’s lots of excess over this period but that doesn’t mean you get to ignore the activity that allows it. Even if it’s a 30min (power) walk, get it done!
7. Don’t drink and drive. Obviously! There’s a really warped and dangerous culture that has become normal. The so called “car knows home” phenomenon. It’s reckless and silly. We shouldn’t do it! Take cab, get a friend to drive, whatever, just leave that mess in the past!
8. Do wear sunscreen. There was a popular misconception when we were younger that black people don’t get sunburn. We’re old enough to know better, so best we do better! You and your kids should leave the house with factor 50 on!
9. For you Maseru types, please don’t bore us with social media posts asking us when we’re going back home. We’ll go when we’re good and ready!
10. And to you Jo’burg types, just carry some cash around for Pete’s sake. That place in Ha Pita where you’re drinking quarts doesn’t have swiping facilities. Yes, we see that’s a black card, but cash is king in these parts.
11. Do stop by elderly relatives! Take the Yuletide cheer to them, you’ll be surprised how much it we them up!

This is a big festive we are into! We must all take care and mind each other. Let’s not have needless misunderstandings and clashes because of egos. It’s been a tough year, and while we don’t know what next year holds, the spidy sense suggests something better. To this end let’s blow off steam from this disastrous year and come back better next year!